Thinking of becoming a nun

[Baroness]

Hi Orthodox friends out there ...

I am 29 years old and have had thoughts about becoming a nun. I don't really know any other girls around my age - or any other woman for that matter - who have a similar desire.

I feel like I'm on my own in this regard as I possibly walk the path towards monasticism. So I was wondering if anyone else out there is on the same path - perhaps we can share information and help and pray for one another?

Thanks and best wishes folks!

[Theopesta]

http://www.pelagia.org/htm/b16.en.saint_gregory_palamas_as_a_hagiorite.05.htm #s13g

St. Gregory Palamas attaches great importance to the way of the monastic life. It is not enough to live in the Monasteries, but one must live in the way of the holy Fathers. The monastery resembles the first Paradise, where Adam and Eve dwelt. Just as there was the tree of knowledge of good and evil there, and just as there was the cunning devil, it is the same now in the Monasteries. So the monks are in great danger of falling, even within their holy walls. Therefore constant readiness and attention are needed.

The aspiration of the monk is to make the inner man a monk. An outward sojourn in a holy place is not enough, but what is needed is an effort to live monasticism inwardly. The saint asks: "how could the inner man become a monk" if he did not first overcome the acquired world and all human learning? This is symbolised by the tonsure, cutting the hair of the head

This struggle is common to monks and nuns. There are not separate commandments for men and women. Therefore in one of his homilies he enjoins the nuns to follow the same manner of life in order to live in the true evangelical way. The nous should be turned to God alone: "look to God alone, make Him your only delight, rejoicing in hope, patient in affliction, obedient to those in charge, serving one another, seeing to the peace among you, always being devoted to attention and prayer and compunction of soul, to psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, being holy and chaste in body and soul, in all your senses and your mind, and manifesting what is spiritual and chaste with all your mind and conduct".

[Kosmas Damianides]

Dear Sister in Christ,

Are you becoming a nun out of necessity or because you want to? This is the question I would try to answer by myself.

If you feel that your life is fulfilled by joining a monastery then you should do it, but if you have any doubts then you need to sort these out first and then decide.

The best thing is to go to a monastery and stay there a while. If you feel monastic life tires you, this is natural, it's supposed to be physically hard but you get used to it. If you are having second thoughts about becoming a nun and feel mentaly and spiritualy drained, then this is not natural(for someone who is truely called to become a nun) it means you have to try harder to get married. God probably dosn't want you to be a nun. But if you ask and pray, I'm sure God will give you the strength to do anything your heart wants.

I hope I havn't said anything wrong and I hope I have not been a stumbling stone but have helped you.

In Christ

Kosmas

[R.J.G.]

Hi. I'm 24, going through the same thing myself. I spent a year and a half as a novice in a monastery; now I'm taking a little time off to reevaluate.

God help you!

[Mother Evfrosinia]

There are 2 main prerequisites to the monastic life: 1) to be willing to struggle to love God above and beyond everything and everyone else, with one's whole heart, mind and spirit, and 2) to be willing to struggle to give up one's own will, in holy obedience, so as to be able to discern the will of God. If you feel called to this, that this is the framework within which you might work out your salvation and acquire God's grace and that this is what really counts and is most important to you, then consider visiting monasteries and getting to know monastics, and if possible, find a spiritual father that thinks along these lines. Most important, read the lives of the monastic saints and the writings of the holy fathers on the monastic life. And May the Lord bless you and guide you as you discern your path!

[Leah Abraham]

Greetings,

I am a 21 year old Orthodox Christian woman. For all my years, I have devoted my life to God alone, a truly blessed life. Yet, I have always felt a deeper calling. Recently, I began researching on vocation and reading the personal spiritual journeys of Orthodox nuns. My prolonged wait has no excuse worthy of use. At times I feel overwhelmed with questions, so I now reach out to my fellow Orthodox Christians. Within the next year, I will be graduating with a Bachelor of Science in Microbiology and entering medical school. Does anyone know of any monasteries in the USA or around the world that has nuns working in the community? I've always dreamed of sharing God's love with others, helping in communities in need. Will I be able to use my medical degree, if I enter a monastic life?

God Bless.
Leah

[Andrew]

Greetings,

I am a 21 year old Orthodox Christian woman. For all my years, I have devoted my life to God alone, a truly blessed life. Yet, I have always felt a deeper calling. Recently, I began researching on vocation and reading the personal spiritual journeys of Orthodox nuns. My prolonged wait has no excuse worthy of use. At times I feel overwhelmed with questions, so I now reach out to my fellow Orthodox Christians. Within the next year, I will be graduating with a Bachelor of Science in Microbiology and entering medical school. Does anyone know of any monasteries in the USA or around the world that has nuns working in the community? I've always dreamed of sharing God's love with others, helping in communities in need. Will I be able to use my medical degree, if I enter a monastic life?

God Bless.
Leah

It is an asset to a monastery to have a inhouse doctor! :)

[Paul Cowan]

Dear Leah,

Have you heard of the Ormylia Convent (http://www.chm.unipg.it/chimgen/network/lbtech/ORMYLIA.html)in Chalkadiki Greece? It is a dependent of Simonopetra Monastery. The nuns and sisters there must have a degree before they are accepted. Perhaps your degree will be of value to them?

Paul

[Robin Elizabeth]

Dear Leah Abraham

You might want to look into Sts Martha and Mary Convent of Mercy in Moscow. It was started shortly before the Russian revolution by St Elizabeth the New Martyr and was a center of social services (including medical care) for the poor. They also had a nursing school, if I remember correctly. Although it was not around during the communist years it has been re-established. Here are a couple of web addresses to get you started.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marfo-Mariinsky_Convent

http://02varvara.wordpress.com/2008/01/21/revival-of-the-martha-and-mary-convent-in-moscow-on-the-100th-anniversary-of-its-foundation/

http://www.cnewa.com/mag-article-bodypg-us.aspx?articleID=3060

Hope this helps.

[Kosta]

Thats so wonderful that we have 2 ladies who post on this forum looking into the monastic vocation. I think going on a pilgrimage to a few monasteries and speaking to the nuns would be very beneficial. I think there maybe differing ambiances in different monasteries especially if one monastery has mostly college educated nuns compared to a more traditional convent where nuns keep to those more "old-fashioned" roles.

[Robin Elizabeth]

Actually there are 3 here looking into the monastic life - since I am also.

The first thing I did was ask my Spiritual Father's advice and blessing to pursue this. I don't know why, but I just felt that it wasn't a decision I was supposed to make on my own. Often a good Father can see things about us much more clearly then we can.

His advice was to visit a number of different monasteries. At least 2 or three. I've been to three so far and am going to a 4th this spring, then I'm planning a return visit to 2 of them this summer. It's amazing how different they all were from each other, even though they were all in the US with almost all American born nuns.

I was hoping for the "love at first sight" experience, which does happen for some, but not for me.

[Sophia]

I am so happy to have found this conversation this morning. I am about to turn 31 and I share the desire to become a nun. It's been something that I have thought about on and off my whole life. Even before I had found the Orthodox church or ever met a monastic.

Baroness, as you can see, there are several of us here. I would love to share more with you.

Like Robin, I too discussed this with my Spiritual Father first and he directed me likewise. Due to may struggles in my life, I have only visited one monastery so far.

Leah, if you haven't heard of them yet, I would highly recommend the Orthodox Monastery of the Transfiguration in Elwood City PA. You can google them and find more info, or contact me and I can give you more. I can't find words to express how the days I spent with them have blessed me. Mother Christophora is the Abress and Mother Barbara is who you would arrange a visit with.

Mother Evfrosinia, I believe that it was about three years ago that I first saw the words you again typed here. I don't recall where it was but I wrote them down instantly. They have been taped to a jewelry box in my bedroom ever since and I read them often. Thank you.

I feel that this is more of a calling than a decision that I am making from my desire. As I started to realize that this is what I long for, I was overly excited/driven to "make it happen". Obsticles arose, and I then went through several months thinking that maybe this wasn't right and I should get married. But that never felt right and I am now coming back to the realization that I am called to the monastic life. I know that it probably won't be an easy journey, but if this is where God is calling me, it's the right path. I find that I feel the most peace and joy every time I remember how it felt the moment I turned on the road leading up to the monastery. It was literally like stepping into a different world for me. I cried when I left and I know that a large part of my heart is still there.

I hope to visit Hogar Rafael Orphanage in Guatemala in the next few years.

Unworthy servant of Christ,
Sophia

[Robin Elizabeth]

Hello Sophia,

So glad to meet you. I too had been drawn to the monastic life even before I knew it really existed.

Don't make the mistake of feeling that obsticles are a sign that you are not meant to be a monastic. I thought so, but when I spoke about them in length to my spiritual father he kinda laughed and said something to the effect that now he knows I'm on the right path. He said that it's the ones that say to him "everything is going great - no problems at all" that he wonders about. And it seems to get worse the more monasteries I visit. Although it may just be that spending time in monasteries just makes one more sensitive to the disorder around and within.

I too have the desire to "make it happen" but I found that my life required some things from me that had to be dealt with before I could go anywhere. So I've tried to learn forbearance.

I've visited the monastery in Ellwood city and was planning to go back at some point, although that hasn't happened yet. The sisters were very wonderful and I was looking forward to seeing them again. Although, I've heard from several people that they are full now with a waiting list (don't know if it's true or not).

I've visited 5 monasteries so far and it's amazing how different they are from one another. I guess that's why everyone I've talked to said to visit several. All the ones I've been to are in the "slavic tradition", so I am thinking about taking a trip to one of the Greek monasteries too. But I'm not sure that's going to happen soon.

Also, can you tell me something about the Hogar Rafael Orphanage? I've never heard of them.

[Ksenia]

http://www.stanthonysmonastery.org/map.php

Greek Orthodox monasteries in USA.

[Jonathan Michael]

As a young Orthodox Christian man who feels called to marriage, my feelings on seeing so many young women drawn to monastacism are mixed...

But that is just my selfish reasoning talking; I pray to God that everyone gets to follow the life God has intended for them! God be with you all.

[Olga]

As a young Orthodox Christian man who feels called to marriage, my feelings on seeing so many young women drawn to monasticism are mixed...


Jonathan, simply reverse the genders in the above quote and see what you get. :) It cuts both ways.

What is most important is that folks who are drawn to monasticism are doing it for the right reasons, and are "made of the right stuff". The same could be said for men who have a wish to become priests. Rather than feel despondent that this or that young, "attractive" young man or woman is drawn to the monastic life, we should rejoice at this, if that person is truly suited for such a life. Good monastics and clergy are precious gems. On the other hand, a wise abbot or abbess will soon weed out those novices who are unsuitable, and "cultivate" those who do have promise.

[Father David Moser]

The same could be said for men who have a wish to become priests. Rather than feel despondent that this or that young, "attractive" young man or woman is drawn to the monastic life, we should rejoice at this, if that person is truly suited for such a life. Good monastics and clergy are precious gems. On the other hand, a wise abbot or abbess will soon weed out those novices who are unsuitable, and "cultivate" those who do have promise.

I have a good friend who is a priest. I first met his wife when she was a monstic novice. "C" thought she was called to monastic life and worked very hard to be a good nun, however, in the end, the abbess sent her home. It was then that she met and married her husband, who, some years later was ordained to the priesthood. Those years of monastic struggle have helped to shape her into the matushka that she is today. God knows what is needed for each of us and uses our situations, whether in a monastery or out of one to shape us.

As for finding a wife (or husband as the case may be), remember you only need to find one person to marry. It is an oddsmaker's fallacy that a large field will increase your "chances" of finding the right person. If you want to find a good Orthodox spouse just put it all in God's hands and He will lead you unfailingly to the right person and the right time. A good example of this was my daughter, who as a young single woman was always being introduced to eligible young men by her friends and (yes its true, I am guilty) family. Whenever it seemed as though a relationship had even a little promise, she went to the relics of St John of San Francisco (where she lived at the time) and prayed for St John's help. Almost invariably the young man in question would stop calling, writing, communicating and seem to drop off the face of the earth. But she did not stop trusting God or asking the help of St John. She met her now husband quite by chance when visiting with us (her mother and I) the old Holy Virgin Cathedral where St John was bishop. At the time it seemed like nothing special, but shortly thereafter they met again and an afternoon bikeride turned into a date which turned into an engagement which led to a wedding and now they have celebrated their first (of many) anniversaries. It only took meeting one person - and that meeting was "arranged" by the prayers of St John. -- shameless plug: my son-in-law has written a blog about Orthodox dating and finding a spouse. It is somewhat tongue in cheek, but also has much truth to it. You can find it here (http://orthromance.blogspot.com/)


Fr David Moser

[Mary]

C" thought she was called to monastic life and worked very hard to be a good nun, however, in the end, the abbess sent her home.... Fr David Moser

How I wish marriage could be tested out the same way, and left behind if it's not the right thing for you!!!

Mary

[Father David Moser]

How I wish marriage could be tested out the same way, and left behind if it's not the right thing for you!!!

Mary

Ah but it can! A novice is not a committed monastic, but only living in a committed relationship with monastic life (okay, that was a bit obtuse, but try and go with the "flow"). The "novitiate" for marriage is the engagement. You are living in a committed relationship with one person, "trying out" that relationship. If it doesn't work, then you have the "no harm no fault" option of walking away. In order to really test that relationship, sometimes it takes years - but then I am a fan of long engagements anyway (mine was 2+ years). If it doesn't work - call it off, you are under no obligation to marry that person (or any person). There is no "penalty" for breaking an engagement. My son-in-law put it quite succinctly in his blog:


Breaking off a relationship can seem like a cruel act, and can seem like an unchristian one at that, when one remembers St. Paul's description of love as being patient, enduring all things.

Christians are supposed to be faithful in all things, bearing all tasks given to them. But, there's a line between bearing your cross that's been given to you and building your own cross to squash you. Continuing to date or marrying the wrong person falls into the latter category. (emphasis mine - D)

Once you're married, you've got a whole new set of commitments, and the nature of your struggle changes. You can't leave your marriage because you fall out of love or you get bored with your partner. Jesus made his view about divorce pretty clear in Matthew 19: "What therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder" (Verse 7). And, from here, keeping a marriage together isn't just obeying God's commandments, but accepting the help that God gives to those who are held together in the covenant of marriage. That help comes in the form of the sacraments.

Before marriage, though, you have a very important choice to make, and you can back out of it at any time. A few days before our wedding, our priest said to us that we could back out of it right then if we wanted. (We didn't.)

Fr David Moser

[M.C. Steenberg]

I have a good friend who is a priest. I first met his wife when she was a monstic novice. "C" thought she was called to monastic life and worked very hard to be a good nun, however, in the end, the abbess sent her home. It was then that she met and married her husband, who, some years later was ordained to the priesthood.

Similarly, one of my dearest friends recounts that as a young man he was utterly convinced that he would pursue the monastic life. 'And then I went to university, and the first person I met was my wife.'

INXC, Dcn Matthew

[Sophia]

Robin,

Hogar Rafael Orphanage is an Orphanage in Guatemala City. http://www.hogarafaelayau.org/

I don't remember how I first heard of them, but I haven't stopped thinking about or praying for them since that moment.

I've start to try to plan my next visit to a monastery. Only God know when or where it'll be. My first experience was wonderful and I hope to grow more through more visits.

I completely agree about the obsticals. If they ever cease, than I know that I have failed. So long as my life has struggles, I am on the right path.

Where all have you visited?

[Anthony]

Mother Evfrosinia also posted a very helpful article on becoming a nun here on Monachos, but for some reason I can't find it. Maybe I was hallucinating, or maybe I am just not very good with the search tool.

[Robin Elizabeth]

Hi Sophia,

Thanks for the info on the Hogar Rafael Orphanage I will check it out.

So far I've been to Transfiguration in Ellwood city, Sts Mary & Martha in SC, St Paisius in AZ, Presentation in MO, and ST Paul Skete in TN. I'm not sure which I'd recommend if I had to choose one, since they are all so different. If you're unfamiliar with them let me know and I'll get you some info.

[Robin Elizabeth]

As a young Orthodox Christian man who feels called to marriage, my feelings on seeing so many young women drawn to monastacism are mixed...

From what I've been told, the vast majority of women who try the monastic life end up finding out that it's not for them and leave.

And the last thing anyone needs is a wife who's supposed to be a nun. Just imagine the problems that would cause!

[Jonathan Michael]

From what I've been told, the vast majority of women who try the monastic life end up finding out that it's not for them and leave.

And the last thing anyone needs is a wife who's supposed to be a nun. Just imagine the problems that would cause!

A very good point, Robin.

[Moses Anthony]

I feel as though I'm new to the community, as I've not logged on for quite some time. Ahhh, but I digress!

As an under grad at a church related university, I'd often visit the Student Union, where there were prayer notes or messages about opportunities for solitary retreats. My heart would long to be able to go on such a retreat. But alas, I was a married, family man!

Years after having become Orthodox it is something I'd still like to do. Enter a Sunday bulletin from my current priest. A group would be meeting of those who, though having an interest in the monastic life, are deeply rooted in a secular setting. Oblates of St. Benedict would live by a modified Rule (reading, prayer, alms, attendance at services, etc.,) approved by the priest, the group's leader. They would try out this form of ascesis for a year, to see if it was a way they really desired to live. If at the end of the trial period they were still so inclined, then they were to make the formal lifetime commitment before the parish. They would then receive a medallion signifying their choice. We are beginning our second year after having taken our vows.

The point of my of my rambling is this: There are options available for those who're inclined towards monasticism, but are not suited for, or cannot physically take that step. I look at my "rule" as a very minor discipline, and yet I still struggle to meet all the requirements.
May God have mercy upon me;

the sinful and unworthy servant!

[Robin Elizabeth]

I'm a bit confused, and a bit curious. I thought that the Oblates of St Benedict was a Roman Catholic religious order. Is there a Orthodox version of the Oblates? My understanding is that the Orthodox Church doesn't have lay orders (oblates, third orders etc) like the Catholic church has.

[Vasiliki D.]

Hi have a question for the clergy or monastics, even perhaps someone else can advise.

Most of the girls have expressed a desire or a calling to be a monastic ... I wanted to ask are there cases where a person did not express either a desire or know of a calling to be a monastic and yet it was predicted for them by enlightened Elders and then they did end up as such even though it was never in their wildest dreams or desires?

There is a person I know who expresses a desire to marry but obstacles keep getting in this persons way preventing them from embarking on a journey to have a family. This person was told by an Elder that one day they would be a monastic but it wasnt there time now ... "much much later" ...

Are there examples of any monastics who didnt desire it but it was foretold? What could bring about such a change?

[Ilaria]

Well, Vasiliki, in a usual relationship between spiritual father and spiritual daughter/son, it is up to the last one to express FIRM desire for monastic life; i think that only exceptions - and these are not without risks - may switch this rule.
the person who embarks for this route will encounter such deep, critical, changes, inside and outside, that only a firm desire would help pass them... as Father Sophrony Saharov said,one may -in fact, should! - come to breaking points when tormenting thoughts would crucify his mind: "what have I done in this life? I have lost everything! even not a child have I raised! even not the least material help I am not able to hand..." and other kind...one of fr. Sophrony disciples, fr. Rafael Noica complete to us: "if in such moments the one who embraced the monastic is not firm enough to face the torments will give up (not rare are the cases...) - but these moments grant genuine calling". That's why at the moment of tonsure he is asked "are you coming from your own will?"

With a slight bit of experience, I think the father who told the girl that she would be monastic - but she was not prepared to receive the word, even if he had foretold it!- took a risk upon himself; he is an Elder, he knew what he did, that's why I do not dare to make any comment, but the risk - for both of them -remain!May God smooth as only He knows to do better what the father hasten somehow.
I hope no one would criticize at first glance what I said above;only remember what happened to st Silouan after an Elder told him: "if you are like this now how will you be later??" 15 years of battles followed! in his case, strong as he was,the years were fruitful, but who knows how many fell...

[Father David Moser]

Monastic life is always a choice. Those who enter monasticism must freely choose to do so (I will concede that sometimes that choice is made reluctantly due to the alternative, but it is still a choice - one cannot be forced to be a monk any more than one can be forced to be married).

If someone "foretold" that another person would be a monk we have no way of knowing whether or not that "foretelling" is true or false until the end of life. Certainly just because such a "foretelling" is made does not determine the life of the person. In such a case, I think the advice of the Fathers towards other mystical "foretellings" (such as visions and dreams) would be the best course to pursue. Ignore it and live your life as God gives it to you each day. If it leads you to monastic life, then well and good and thank God for His mercy. If it leads you elsewhere, then do not be distressed or worried for it may be that the "foretelling" was in error or that your life has not yet ended and there is no way of knowing what tomorrow will bring.

Fr David Moser

[Vasiliki D.]

Monastic life is always a choice. Those who enter monasticism must freely choose to do so (I will concede that sometimes that choice is made reluctantly due to the alternative, but it is still a choice - one cannot be forced to be a monk any more than one can be forced to be married).

If someone "foretold" that another person would be a monk we have no way of knowing whether or not that "foretelling" is true or false until the end of life. Certainly just because such a "foretelling" is made does not determine the life of the person. In such a case, I think the advice of the Fathers towards other mystical "foretellings" (such as visions and dreams) would be the best course to pursue. Ignore it and live your life as God gives it to you each day. If it leads you to monastic life, then well and good and thank God for His mercy. If it leads you elsewhere, then do not be distressed or worried for it may be that the "foretelling" was in error or that your life has not yet ended and there is no way of knowing what tomorrow will bring.

Fr David Moser

Thank you Father i will pass on this advise to my friend.

Just a point of clarification for everyone, my friend visited an "enlightened" Elder not just 'an" elder - you know the type we all love to talk about, one that is considered to be "like" a Gerontas Paisios type of "enlightened". This particular Elder is called from all over the world and many people I know call him for his advise on a regular basis ...

I think this girls problem is that she would never make the decision to be a monastic just because she felt she had "no other alternative" (she is too sober minded and sensible and would not do it just because she is scapegoating life) I think that it rather amuses her logic that there is a "possibility" she will be a monastic (since she trusts in the credibility of this Elder's "prophecy" if you will) ... since this is the farthest thing from her mind - she wants to marry and have a family.

Another point of clarification about the Elder's "prophecy" (who knows perhaps it isnt we are only speculating) was he clearly said to her ... its not your time yet.

I think the advise you gave is probably the most sensible .. she should not really think about it, live her life and make her decisions as per normal and if it is God's Will for it to happen - He will put out the calling at the right time.

Thanks. I will give you all an update to her reaction!

[Stuart Dunn]

Like with every vocation, be it a monastic life or a married life, it is not something you decide one day and that's the end. It is a decision and commitment you make each day to live that vocation with God's help.

[Robin Elizabeth]

"this is the farthest thing from her mind - she wants to marry and have a family."

I know of one woman that wanted desperately to marry and have a family who had some friends who were going to a monastery for a weekend retreat and just happened to ask her if she wanted to go along. By the time she left a few days later she knew she would be a nun. And now she is. She had never given it the least thought before that weekend and would never have even visited a monastery on her own.

My suggestion is that your friend visit a few monasteries for a few days retreat.

[Shelley Platt]

Hi Sophia,

So far I've been to Transfiguration in Ellwood city, Sts Mary & Martha in SC, St Paisius in AZ, Presentation in MO, and ST Paul Skete in TN. .

On the website of All Merciful Savior Orthodox Monastery, of ROCOR, located on Vashon Island off Seattle, there is a short article about the tonsuring of a nun earlier this month. It says they are hoping this will be the seed for a women's monastery there. Perhaps you would be able to visit there also.

[Katherine]

Christ is Risen!

Dear friends! I haven't visited this website for quite some time. I am happy to find this post again, and re-read it. I am "Baroness", but use my real name now "Katherine", as the forum requested it some time ago.

I am so pleased to see there are other women who have posted here who are also interested in monasticism. Do seek this calling if you have the opportunity.

Since I made this original post in 2005, I joined a convent and was made a novice, and lived in the monastic community for a year. Sadly, due to my disbelief, doubts, temptations and illness, I decided to leave though deep down in my heart I knew that my "calling" was genuine, that I'd be back again, and that I was really running away.

I came home, and have been home now just coming up on a year. I went back to work, and have gone through quite a few hardships, including a number of deaths and tradegies, in my family. I have also had to work myself out, and have come to the acceptance that I do want to be a nun, and cannot live any other life but this life. That's a major revelation for me, and I have peace about it. When I confessed this to my Abbess, she smiled and said, "I know." And I smiled, as I knew she knew all along.

Currently, I am undergoing treatment for my health, and when healthwise I am back on track, I will be going back to the convent - this time for good, glory to God. (My Abbess was not surprised. She said, they didn't even remove my name off the roster list, knowing that I'd be back!)

The temptations are very real when you're struggling to seek God with all your heart. But even though it's really hard, it is so worth it! I would encourage all of you women out there who are interested in monasticism to go and live at a convent, try it out and see how - with God's help and grace - you go. Staying at a convent for months as a guest is one thing, but when you're really a part of the community, that's another thing.

Glory to God in all things!
Katherine :-)

[Paul Cowan]

Dear Katherine,

Can you tell us more of your experiences as a novice? How your family dealt with your leaving and returning to the world? I assume for men, there are the same challenges to overcome. What were your preparations to "leaving"? selling all your posession, car, apartment/house bank account knowing or not you may never return to the world. How did you manage when you came home? With no money or place to live how did you re-engage with society and get back on your feet.

I envision living on the street if after some time, one cannot prove who they are or have money to rent a place to live and not being able to get a job without having a place to call home. Did family supplement all these needs?

Forgive me for all the personal quesions. Do not feel obligated to share or to share in public. When my wife dies, I also want to pursue this way of life, and I am terribly fearful of failure and having to return to the world with nothing or less than nothing to support myself. I, many times a day, think about living on the streets begging alms with no place to be or work to do. Such is my weakness of Faith.

in Christ
Paul

[Fr Seraphim (Black)]

With humility I would like to say that the only requirement for monastic life is: the yearning for REPENTANCE.

This is not an original thought; it is rather the feeling of Blessed Father Sophrony.

When I hear that monks/nuns must have an academic degree to enter a convent/monastery, I truly lament.

This is very much a Roman Catholic view of monasticism. They have a hermit order, centered in Italy, which demands a very high academic degree if you wish to enter. An Order of Hermits which demands a Degree of Divinity?!

Something dreadfully wrong there.

If this is also truly the status of Ormylia, it is a cause for lamentation.

Any Orthodox monastery/convent that requires a degree in car mechanics or anything should be your first indication to look elsewhere - and please do not misunderstand me, any knowledge of car mechanics will definitely come in very handy!

But an Orthodox Community who demands academic standing is an Orthodox Community which has lost its direction. In my humble (hopefully) estimation: Look elsewhere.

As Ilaria from Romania states there are Staretz' who can clearly indicate the way of God: the question remains; can you handle the response? Thus, Elders do not run around, as a rule, foretelling a person's vocation.

I am happy for the former 'baroness' - since like all Orthodox Christians: married, single, monastic...whatever; they (she) has been 'tried by fire' and it will continue, of this we have no doubt.

He/she who will follow Christ will follow Christ! You will drink from the Cup.

"There is nothing more ideal than monasticim. Monasticism means theosis, santification of soul and body, communion with God. Monasticism is consciousness, awareness, and discovery of the Kingdom of God within man. Who is wise and will really understand these things? (cf. Ps. 106:43)...Without monasticism no one reaches dispassion. No one obtains a pure nous without vigils, abstinence, and unceasing prayer. No one attains theoria without a monastic lifestyle. No one acquires such a close relationship and contact with Jesus as he who stays near Him and does not abandon Him. Then he will be worthy of the Beatitude: 'Blessed are those who hear the word of God.' (Luke 11:28)" - Elder Ephraim, Monastery of Saint Anthony.

[Irene]

It is good to see you post again Katherine, I had been wondering recently where the "Baroness" had gone, along with others that I haven't seen post for a very long time.

Your struggles are interesting to me and like Paul I would love to hear more about your experiences as a novice.

[J. K. Amra]

Hi Orthodox friends out there ...

I am 29 years old and have had thoughts about becoming a nun. I don't really know any other girls around my age - or any other woman for that matter - who have a similar desire.

I feel like I'm on my own in this regard as I possibly walk the path towards monasticism. So I was wondering if anyone else out there is on the same path - perhaps we can share information and help and pray for one another?

Thanks and best wishes folks!


Hi friend, you are not alone, I am a teenage male who thirsts for a monastic ascetic way of life, you can also count on me being alone in this, even my own family is against it. Allthough these people here will support you and tell you the 'great importance of monastic living', etc, etc, and give you many great quotes and advices and what not, the choice alone is up to you and no number of quotes or advices from other people on the internet can help you truly decide. You'll probably never know if you never try it and see if its right for you. Its best to try, than to regret for the rest of our lives, or in our case eternity, and wonder of what could of been.

I, myself, am tired of living in vanity while the rest of the world drowns in their own pompousity, materialistic self-preservation, pride, filth, fake emotions and the constant on-going search for the next best thing that will make them happy.

I search for happiness and joy, but the only happiness and joy that I find is in Christ Jesus Our Lord, if you are too - tired of living in vanity, then you have to take the step towards monastism now, and not later, because while you're still "deciding", its going to be too late and you would have lost the desire for your calling, because trust me, a calling doesn't call and last forever, and only a very few in the world are bold enough to take this step, the step is right in front of you, you can either turn around and go back to the world, or you can die for the world, and find life in Christ. The choice is yours.


I will pray for you, that you will find spiritual path that you wish to take, and I also pray, God willing, that my financial obligations to my family are fulfilled in the next couple of years so I can, too, like you see if monasticism is right for me.

[Paul Cowan]

ummm, J.K., you might want to read the last few posts in this thread. She has already decided. ;)

[Katherine]

Hi Paul and Monachos Friends,

Christ is Risen!

Thanks for your messages. I have spent nearly two days thinking over your questions. To start off with, my family are not church-goers; although my Dad’s family are Orthodox, I grew up following in my Mum’s footsteps and attended the Protestant church Sunday School. Therefore when I eventually converted to Orthodoxy, then wanted to join a monastery, it was very hard for my family – even those who are regular Orthodox churchgoers – to understand why on earth I would want to go and become a nun! They found it very difficult to accept but in the end they let me go because they knew it was what I wished to do.

As to “preparations to leaving”, I had given some of my things away previously, just to simplify my own life. Other than that, I did not prepare anything as such and went by my Abbess’ instructions and really just prepared my heart spiritually for the journey ahead. It is probably up to the Abbess or Abbott of the monastery you join to tell you whether it is best to sell or give away your possessions. My Abbess did not advise me to do so. As I was still living with my parents, I simply left my bedroom, bank account, things as they were. My Abbess says for each person it is different, but “when we come to it, then we’ll think about what to do” ie. when I’m tonsured a nun, then dispose of possessions – I would donate my car for the monastery’s use, donate books for the library, donate money etc. It may not be advised to give away your things so quickly because truly, one does need to live in a monastery to see if it is the life for them. To become a monastic for life is also not a decision that is made easily, and not a decision most people make after a short period of time being there. Some people may be novices for 5 or more years and then decide monsticism is not the life for them. As someone mentioned earlier, I think, being a novice is really like an “engagement period”, so you have the freedom of leaving, not having made any life commitments. Being tonsured on the other hand, is like marriage. Just as you would join with your spouse’s bank account, and share things, so like in the monastery.

Therefore when I chose to leave, I still had my car to drive, a little savings in the bank, and had my parents’ home to come home to. My parents were over the moon about me coming home. I convinced myself I was too, but in my heart knew I wasn’t following my “calling” and being true to my heart. In all honesty, I was afraid of being a monastic and taking that huge step out of the boat! Nevertheless, after a couple of months rest in order to get my health up and running a little better, I went back to work in a Protestant Christian bookshop working in a call-centre. When I went for my job interview, I was upfront and said I had lived in a monastery, and even joked with the manager who was interviewing me “I wouldn’t be surprised if I end up there again in years to come.” The staff there thought “that’s interesting!” and hired me for the position. I enjoyed working in the shop, but only lasted just over 4 months and in the end resigned “because the call is too strong and I need to go back to the convent and do what I’m supposed to be doing!”

So, I left my job. My Abbess suggested coming back ASAP, but as we talked and the way things in life unfolded, I ended up staying at home and undergoing a health program in order to strengthen me as much as possible before I go back for good. We also had deaths, particularly the tragic death of my brother Mark (may his memory be eternal!) in my family so, as it turned out, it was good that I was able to be home for this period of time.

Re-engaging in society wasn’t too hard for me because I’m not a social butterfly and never went out much anyway. I still prefer to live a quiet life. My first time walking back into my home church without my nun’s habit (or whatever we call it in the Orthodox church) on was tough – more tough for me than everyone else, as I felt like I had failed God and failed myself. Folks in church were very accepting of me back into the community. You know though, not wearing my nun’s habit and putting on colours again, wearing pants, not having a cover on my head – all of this was a transition, and something I still don’t feel comfortable with. Also, I find that my head and heart is still in monastery time; I look at the clock noticing what time it is and think to myself, “oh, we’d be doing this now …” or “time for prayers…”

Naturally, when I let my family know that I wanted to go back to the monastery, this time for good, they seemed to take it harder the second time round than the first. But now, after all these family tragedies, they have also realized that it is better for me to be at the convent, that I don’t have a life here in the “world” and that "someone needs to be doing the praying in the family!"

One of the last things my Abbess said to me before I left was “when you’re given something as a gift, then lose it and have to gain it back the hard way, it often becomes more precious to you when you receive it again.” She also reassured me, “it’s OK to make mistakes in life.” I kind of knew what she meant, but wasn’t sure. I wrote it down and tried not to think about it anymore, even though it tugged at my heart daily. As I look back now – especially today, as it was exactly today this time last year that I left – I know precisely what she means. I didn’t see this gift of monasticism for what it is when I was there. A pearl, a priceless pearl! Now that I’m away, I value it ever so much, and when I receive it back again in God’s good time, I will treasure it for the rest of my living days.

I encourage anyone who has these desires to test the waters. Even though I was fearful about giving all my things away and all that preparation, now that I look back, it was unnecessary. God provided for me at the convent, and continued to provide for me when I left, and still continues to provide for me daily as I prepare to go back again. And He will do the same for you. Your spiritual advisor will advise you what is best, and God will help you – He will never leave you destitute! Our God is so good.

So, that’s part of my story. Forgive me for rambling on. I am a doubtful sinner, but am thankful for the experience all the same because, as I said above, I have discovered how valuable this pearl of monasticism is, and look forward to taking up my cross again.

May our Lord Jesus Christ God with you on your journey to finding the Priceless Pearl!

Glory to Him!
Katherine

[Paul Cowan]

Dear Katherine,

Thank you!

You are so right. When the time comes, God will guide and He will provide. I seem to lose track of that second part. Also being a very independant person, I struggle asking for help. Being a monastic is strict obedience. I can follow orders and directions, I have trouble going to the person and asking for them.

I am very sorry for the loss of your brother. His death may also play into God's plan for you (I am not suggesting He caused his death) for you to be able to cut all ties with family and easier to move on to the monastery. I know it will be hardest for me to leave my brother. We are fairly close.

Please pray for me now and when you leave again to renew your struggles.

Paul

[Angela V.]

Dear Katherine,

Xristos Anesti!

Reading your post, made me think how blessed you are! Me and my husband go to a monestery in Geelong (Melb) and it is beautiful. I am truly happy that you are deciding to try again. God bless you always. If we had children, we would be honoured if they decided to become a nun or a monk.

+Angela

[Ilaria]

I have trouble going to the person and asking for them Dear Paul, 99% you will not need to go because they will find you :)

Nearly 6 years ago I used to work in an international bank and it happened to be appreciated enough there; suddenly (for them, not for me!), I told them that I am going to join an orthodox association - this was not a lie as our church do have an association; however, I did not tell them that I will leave my home and my business wardrobe and so...
it was so exciting - before!; it was so hard - after!
that's why I stressed that I was appreciated; this appreciation was the world in me and when one tries to show the door for this world the war starts;
My spiritual father is the best father for me, he is my "best asset"; being so, he did take me on his shoulders, otherwise, I am sure I would not have managed all the hardships; but, it is God who works besides;
so, I will not go into further details, because each one has its own path; after all the challenges, I am still inside!
After 4 years, I sold my apartment; so, it took me 4 years, but can not describe the feeling after - I felt such a freedom in my heart; but I still have some personal belongings at my parents house;

so, do not be afraid; there will be so many things to do - you can not imagine!
I used to wonder: what I have to do there? I will be bored? I will be useless?I'll stay and watch because I do not know how to do this and that; me and my banking in my head!!!
Fr Rafail said in a conference: and so we found that we are so limited; but so we find also that we may extend our limits;
so, to go the end:
Paul, living in a community is a continuous extending of one's limits; from all points of view; you have to prepare yourself before, if possible, what I did not and suffered
try to do things you dislike and try to refrain from asking the other one to do what you think he/she has to and did not; this is the hardest part
but the most wonderful thing one discovers, especially when is too hard is...God

[J. K. Amra]

I apologize for not having read the last couple of posts on this thread, I am very happy for you Katherine and Ilaria that you had the guts to do what you did, even reading your posts about your monastic experiences gives me joyous feelings, I can only imagine what it really feels like when a person does it him/herself. I am trying to finish school right now, and am little by little realizing what our God Christ meant when He said "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple." in Luke 14:26. Also Saint Anthony the Great when he said "Always have the fear of God before your eyes. Remember Him who gives death and lives. Hate the world and all that is in it. Hate the peace that comes from the flesh. Renounce this life, so that you may be alive to God." - I think that these, and many other verses are the core of monasticism. The problem I think that, in my case at least, I understand the world, but the world doesn't understand me. I hope I have the courage to leave everything behind, which is not much, and face the reactions of my family (who for the most part will be strongly against me leaving), though I do still have some questions as in, if I need some kind of financial income for when I decide to leave, that is if I am worthy to be accepted as a novice at a monastery. I know this is a silly question, but you start to have many doubts when you finally start to think about it.

[Kathryn Johnson]

Hello all,

I have been following allowing with this discussion, and it speaks to me. I am 25 years old, female, and have been in a relationship for 6 years. Marriage to this man may or may not happen, and now I question if I am meant to be with him. Also, more and more, my feelings are less marriage-centered and more focused on living out God's will for me, whatever that may be. Lately we have even questioned this together, as we note a lack of "romantic" feelings and leanings more towards "platonic", enjoying each other's company and conversation. However, years ago, and again now, I have been thinking a LOT about the possibility of being a nun. The feelings I have almost scare me because it is so different than what I thought would happen in my life. Is it funny, after these feelings of yearning came up, I saw a show on TV about a woman my age who suddenly decided to be a nun. My saint is St. Juliana of Lazarevo, who gave away her possessions to the poor. From the time I was a young girl, I have been most interested in helping people. To me, the only thing in life that makes sense is to pray for everyone and help people as much as possible. I have always been very quiet, I don't talk much, and I tend to observe people and interactions and think about things deeply. The times I am most at peace is when I am in nature, quiet...listening to holy music, reading scripture or holy books. I prefer solitude much of the time.
I have struggled with deciding if my relationship with my boyfriend is what I should be doing with my life. Again, more and more I feel drawn to something else. I am starting to read prayers for discernment, so I can hear God's answer. Do you have any suggestions for these kinds of prayers that may help me know what the right decision is? I feel paralyzed in a sense right now. I do not have a spiritual father. I have talked to my priest on occasion. My family is Orthodox...my parents go to church on Sundays but that is about the extent. I am in my first job out of school and living at home to save money. Oh, boy the thought of this discussion with my parents makes me nervous. I know, I'm 25, but my mother has strong influence over me and thinks I should work in the government. I have never been strongly drawn to the idea of marriage, a family, children, etc. I read about the Orthodox Monastery of the Transfiguration in Pennsylvania, and am wondering if I should try to visit for a weekend.

[Herman Blaydoe]

Well, first things first, and a visit to the monastery and a chat with the abbess is absolutely the best thing to do. And a visit Holy Transfiguration Monastery would a wonderful place to start.

Here is a prayer from the "Come to Me" prayer book of the American Carpatho-Russian Orthodox Diocese (ACROD). It is to be said by all Orthodox Christians, not simply those contemplating monasticism, but I think it worthwhile.

O Lord, into Your most merciful hands I commend my whole self, body and soul, my thoughts, words, and deeds, my desires and my intentions. I commend the very needs of my body and soul, my future and my past, my faith and my hope, the end of my life, the very day and hour of my death and the burial and resurrection of my body to You. O most merciful God, Whose steadfast love the sins of the world can never transcend, take me, a sinner, beneath the wings of Your protection and deliver me from every evil. Cleanse my iniquities, enable me to reform my life, and protect me against future transgressions, that I might not even so much as anger You again. Shelter my weaknesses from passions and evil persons, guard me against visible and invisible enemies, lead me on the road to salvation and to Yourself, that safe harbor and haven of my soul's desires. Grant me a happy, peaceful and Christian death; protect me from the spirits of evil. Be merciful to me, Your servant, at the great day of Judgment, and number me among the blessed flock who stand at Your right, that together with them, I may glorify You, my Creator, forever and ever. Amen

[Cyprian (Humphrey)]

I'm a bit confused, and a bit curious. I thought that the Oblates of St Benedict was a Roman Catholic religious order. Is there a Orthodox version of the Oblates? My understanding is that the Orthodox Church doesn't have lay orders (oblates, third orders etc) like the Catholic church has.

I skimmed through the thread and it didn't look like this has been answered. My apologies if it has, and I missed it.

Actually, there are Orthodox Benedictine monks and oblates. I think there's currently one female oblate that has the blessing to wear her habit full-time, but I don't think she's technically a nun yet - I could be wrong though!

They are Western Rite Orthodox, and part of ROCOR, living in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. www.christminster.ca (http://www.christminster.ca) is their website.

It's true that the Orthodox don't have orders, but that's more of the historical praxis of the East, rather than a calculated decision against the idea of orders. The only order in existence within Canonical Orthodoxy is Benedictine, as the Benedictine order is the only one that currently exists that has pre-schism roots. As I understand it, there were a couple of other orders existing at the time of the schism, but they've either died out, or gone through significant "re-inventioning". Sadly, there's a plethora of other "orders" amongst the not-so-much-canonical groups.

But, if one looks closely at the way the Benedictines do things, it is pretty close to Orthodox, in some senses. Each Benedictine monastery is independant, just like the Orthodox ones. The Benedictine Order is simply a loose fraternity of those independant monasteries, and their dependancies.

But, this tends to be a "hot-button" topic, as not everyone who is Orthodox is equally convinced that Western Rite is necessary, nor that Western Rite as currently practiced is perfect. But that's for another thread! Make a new thread if you want to discuss that!

[Father David Moser]

But, this tends to be a "hot-button" topic, as not everyone who is Orthodox is equally convinced that Western Rite is necessary, nor that Western Rite as currently practiced is perfect. But that's for another thread! Make a new thread if you want to discuss that!

Or better yet, just add to the threads that are already there.

[Effie Ganatsios]

Most monasteries accept guests for short periods of time. The guests are expected to attend church services and, in general, lead the same life as the nuns do.

Living in a monastery can only have positive results. One would be the ability to separate romantic illusions from reality.

Baroness, I hope you find what you are looking for.

Effie

[Margaret S.]

Dear Kathryn

A visit to monastery is a very good idea, especially if you can talk comfortably with the Abbess. It is a bigger help than perhaps you can imagine to talk someone who really understands because it gets it out of your imagination into reality and makes it more possible to deal with. It might also be good also to start praying for a spiritual father or mother at this point - you will need one. Katherine (Baroness) is now a nun so there is some encouragement for you :)

I think this is a very exciting thing even to consider and I hope with all my heart it works out well for you whatever step you finally take.

In Christ
Margaret
from Edinburgh

[Anna Stickles]

Katheryn,

Holy Transfiguration is a nice monastery. I have visited their a couple of times, but I believe that right now they are not accepting any more sisters because they are full. A visit there might still be worthwhile as Mother Christophora might be able to give you some council. One of the times I was there, there was a young lady who was seeking as you are and she was going around visiting a number of the different women's monasteries and talking to the abesses. Each monastery is so very different.

[Margaret S.]

she was going around visiting a number of the different women's monasteries

The Catholics, I believe, call this a "nun run" especially when a group of women get together to do it :)

Regards
Margaret
in Edinburgh

[Paul Cowan]

"nun run"

Regards
Margaret
in Edinburgh

Such is the will of man versus the will of God. How often do we try to pick and choose our own fate and destinies when if we left decisions especially like this decision up to God, He would place the candidate in the Perfect monastery rather than a Nice monastery.

Or job or spouse or home or friends or ________

Paul

[Margaret S.]

Yes, you are right, Paul, but still a "nun run" alone or with like-minded friends is a good idea I think.

I heard Sister Magdalen of Tolleshunt Knights speak last summer and she said something like this... that because of the kind of obedience a monastic owes his abbot that he must look and look and look and make all his choices with his eyes wide open before he joins a monastery because only in exceptional circumstances will there be any choices afterwards. Besides, Kathryn is not at that stage, right now she probably just needs to meet some nuns.

:)
Regards
Margaret
in Edinburgh

[Paul Cowan]

HI Margaret,

I did not mean to come across negative by my post. I was thinking of the "folly" man has in his own mind that he knows better for himself than God does. I read a story of a youth who came to a monastery and when was invited to be a novice he said he first had to take care of a few things he planned to do before he was accepted, to which the iguman said "plans? you can go take care of your plans but do not return here, or stay here now." This is horribly paraphrased, but as the bible says "you fool, today your life is expected of you."

I know it is best to visit with several monasteries as it is not only our fit into the monastery, but the monasteries fit into us. If I were in this situation and had (X) number of places to visit, I would only HOPE I would know when to stop visiting and to settle in.

Paul

[Margaret S.]

I have come across a similar story, the young monk is planning this, that, the other and the next thing and his elder eventually says to him, "So tell me, where DID you find this monasticism so full of plans?" You are definitely right that the issue for many people, including me I have to say, would be being aware of when God was saying "stop here". And you didn't come across as negative, I'm sorry I managed to imply that you did.

Margaret

[Panayota K.]

Hello Paul and Margarret. I believe the stories you remember are both from "Elder Joseph the Hesychast" and the person who went to visit but stayed as a novice to him is father Charalampos the Neptic.

[Paul Cowan]

Thank you Panayota. I read the lives of the saints all the time, and I regret, they all run together. I can barely remember my own anniversary, let alone 2000 years of martyrs and others.

Paul

[Robin Elizabeth]

I skimmed through the thread and it didn't look like this has been answered. My apologies if it has, and I missed it.

Actually, there are Orthodox Benedictine monks and oblates. I think there's currently one female oblate that has the blessing to wear her habit full-time, but I don't think she's technically a nun yet - I could be wrong though!

They are Western Rite Orthodox, and part of ROCOR, living in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. www.christminster.ca (http://www.christminster.ca) is their website.


Dear Father Cyprian,

Thanks so much for the info. Actually I've been so busy that I haven't been here for quite awhile, so the lack of answer didn't faze me at all.

Unfortunately right now I am at an impasse about entering the monastic life. Over the past year my health has deteriorated to the point that I don't think I would be able to enter a monastery (or that any monastery would have me).

Having spent a number of years as a Catholic before my conversion I have no problem with the Western rite and would love to check out the oblates. Problem is that they are so far away and right now traveling would be a problem. Do you know if there are any groups of oblates closer than the ones in Ontario? Also, do you happen to have any more info on the the female oblate you mentioned. If I could contact her she could probably answer a lot of my questions directly.

Thanks

[Cyprian (Humphrey)]

I don't know her name, but she seems to be associated with St Benet House (the women's guest house), and St Bede's Guild (their bookstore). The contact info from their website is:

St. Bede’s Guild: 129 Steven Street
Hamilton, ON L8L 2C4 CANADA
905-522-3400

St. Benet House: 130 Steven Street
Hamilton, ON L8L 2C4 CANADA
orthodoxoblate@gmail.com


WRT to the oblates, it seems that distance is not really that much of a problem, as they seem to have oblates all over North America. I'd contact them directly at:

Monastery of Christ the Saviour:
388 Cannon Street East
Hamilton, ON L8L 2C4 CANADA
905-522-3400
christminster@gmail.com

I've yet to meet him in the flesh, but all who have said Dom James is very approachable and doesn't mind answering questions.

[Fr Seraphim (Black)]

Yes, you are right, Paul, but still a "nun run" alone or with like-minded friends is a good idea I think.

I heard Sister Magdalen of Tolleshunt Knights speak last summer and she said something like this... that because of the kind of obedience a monastic owes his abbot that he must look and look and look and make all his choices with his eyes wide open before he joins a monastery because only in exceptional circumstances will there be any choices afterwards. Besides, Kathryn is not at that stage, right now she probably just needs to meet some nuns.

It may indeed be that Sr. Magdalen said this, but having known Sr. Magdalen since 1975 (even when she was not a monastic) I hardly believe that you can take this as the meaning of her words; Sr. Magdalen herself did not visit other monasteries. She came to the Monastery, as her Spiritual Father lived there; that is to say, when she decided upon monastic life. (As in the Orthodox parish she attended she had a devoted and caring spiritual father).

Having said that, the beauty of Orthodoxy is the personal nature of it. On the Holy Mountain, it is a venerable and ancient tradition to visit the various sketes, hermitages, Monasteries, until the Holy Spirit touches your heart in a particular way and you feel moved to set your roots in this particular place of repentance.

Some come and stay where the boat reached the shore, (back in former times, before the gigantic and unnecessary ships that ply the waters now); some Grace-filled souls go directly to the desert, Karoulia, Katounakia, and such areas, while others feel called to the coenobitic houses. For instance, in the last decade of so, the Holy Monastery of Vatopedi, has grown and grown, after a prolonged period of spiritual desolation.

In Romania, God blessed me to meet many nuns, and each has their path, but such holy places such Agapia and Varatec which are separated by barely 8 kilometres have over 500 hundred nuns in each - this in an area of, let us say 10 kilometres there are 1,000 nuns living the Angelic life.

Fr. Sophrony always emphasized that the only requirement for monastic life was the desire to repent.

If one attempts to analyze every possibility that may occur it becomes just another ploy of the enemy of our salvation, one follows his game plan which is to get entangled in thoughts [logosmoi] - at best, a fruitless endeavour.

Rather one should pray and trust in Christ, and casting away all human notions, to be inspired not only by the great abbas and ammas of the 4th century but also the countless contemporay ascetics, who gave their lives to Christ and trusted that He in Love for each of us, will guard, protect, comfort and direct those who are called to be His disciples in this particular path which together with the Sacrament of Marriage forms part of the earthly pilgrimage of the Orthodox Church.

forgive my poor words

[Margaret S.]

Your blessing, Father.

I am not a good writer and have undoubtedly expressed myself badly. What I understood Sister Magdalen to be doing (and she was not speaking to an audience of 'wannabe' monastics) was warning against being romantic and saying that the decision to choose a certain monastery or spiritual father had to be sober. I didn't necessarily think - and I am sorry to have conveyed - that the looking was literal physical investigation although it may be for some people given that what makes a decision sober will vary from person to person. If my spiritual father was in a particular monastery then that is where I would wish to be above all the monasteries in the world.

In Christ,
Margaret in Edinburgh

[Robin Elizabeth]

I don't know her name, but she seems to be associated with St Benet House (the women's guest house), and St Bede's Guild (their bookstore). The contact info from their website is:

St. Bede’s Guild: 129 Steven Street
Hamilton, ON L8L 2C4 CANADA
905-522-3400

St. Benet House: 130 Steven Street
Hamilton, ON L8L 2C4 CANADA
orthodoxoblate@gmail.com


WRT to the oblates, it seems that distance is not really that much of a problem, as they seem to have oblates all over North America. I'd contact them directly at:

Monastery of Christ the Saviour:
388 Cannon Street East
Hamilton, ON L8L 2C4 CANADA
905-522-3400
christminster@gmail.com

I've yet to meet him in the flesh, but all who have said Dom James is very approachable and doesn't mind answering questions.

Thanks so much for the info. I have tried over the past several days to get onto their website to read more about the oblates, but most of the links (including the oblate one) lead to blank pages.

I am assuming that Dom James is in charge of the oblates, so I've decided to just write to him and find out more.

By the way, I did happen across an article with a reference to the sister, her name is Sister Sophia. I was curious why she is habited? I didn't know oblates ever wore their habits full time, in fact I thought they only used them for burial.

[Cyprian (Humphrey)]

As I understand it, Sr Sophia has a blessing to wear her habit full time - this would be an exception, by definition. I believe oblates normally may wear their habits to church, if the rector approves it. Dom James would be the person to ask about this.

Yeah, their website seems to have some "issues". I think the person who was sorting out their website is no longer there, and it looks like the job went to the ever popular Fr "Somebody-else".

[Robin Elizabeth]

As I understand it, Sr Sophia has a blessing to wear her habit full time - this would be an exception, by definition. I believe oblates normally may wear their habits to church, if the rector approves it. Dom James would be the person to ask about this.

Yeah, their website seems to have some "issues". I think the person who was sorting out their website is no longer there, and it looks like the job went to the ever popular Fr "Somebody-else".

Just out of curiosity, do you have any idea what reasons could be used to allow this? Of course, you have no idea in Sr Sophia's case, I was just wondering in general.

[Cyprian (Humphrey)]

Just out of curiosity, do you have any idea what reasons could be used to allow this? Of course, you have no idea in Sr Sophia's case, I was just wondering in general.
I would assume it has something to do with the fact that she's effectively living at the monastery (although in a building across the street!).

[Robin Elizabeth]

I would assume it has something to do with the fact that she's effectively living at the monastery (although in a building across the street!).

Actually she was habited while still in Colorado. I was wondering if the monks at Christminster are planning on starting a community of vowed oblates for women. There are communities of Oblates in the Catholic church, maybe that's a goal of the Western rite Benedictines as well.

[Cyprian (Humphrey)]

Well, that's what I get for assuming! I think I should go back to being quiet now... :)

[Robin Elizabeth]

Well, that's what I get for assuming! I think I should go back to being quiet now... :)

Don't worry about it, I am thinking that perhaps her moving to Canada was in the works for awhile and that she was probably habited in preparation.

[Katrina]

Hello dear friends,
I have also an interest to monastic life, even though I´m married.
I don´t think monastic life attracts someone, because they haven´t found a spouse.

[Katrina]

Does anyone know any Orthodox convent which takes volonteers or visitors? I have visited many catholic convents. Last in Sweden Heliga Hjärtas Kloster (Holy Hearts convent), a benedictine convent. I recommend to anyone who wants to rest. But I have never stayed a longer period in a Orthodox convent. I have been in a Orthodox monastery (for monks), but is not the same. In the benedictine convent was very nice to be among the nuns, to be a woman. In orthodox monastery women are a little bit seen as a nuisance. So does anyone has a hint ?

[Dusja]

Hello, Katrina! What about asking Father Feofan in Copenhagen? There is an Orthodox convent of the Moscow Patriarchate in Denmark, address Hesbjergvej 50, 5481 Blommenlyst on the island of Fyn near Odense. Father Feofan's e-mail: feofanlu@rambler.ru. Mother Amvrosiya in this small Convent speaks English. And the famous Orthodox Convent of Pyhtitsa (Moscow Patriarchate) (Piukhtitsa) in Estonia - perhaps some of the sisters there also speak English, but I'm not sure. And the Convent of Lintula (Finnish Orthodox Church, Ecumenical Patriarchate), I believe several of the sisters speak English.

[Katrina]

Hello Dusja,
It was the convent in Denmark, that I was thinking about in the beginning. Thank you for the e-mail ! I was really happy and surprised ,when I saw this. Maybe it´s an answer for my prayers.
God bless you!

[Fr Seraphim (Black)]

Does anyone know any Orthodox convent which takes volonteers or visitors? I have visited many catholic convents. Last in Sweden Heliga Hjärtas Kloster (Holy Hearts convent), a benedictine convent. I recommend to anyone who wants to rest. But I have never stayed a longer period in a Orthodox convent. I have been in a Orthodox monastery (for monks), but is not the same. In the benedictine convent was very nice to be among the nuns, to be a woman. In orthodox monastery women are a little bit seen as a nuisance. So does anyone has a hint ?

Volonteers!

Welcome!

Please, let me hold open the door for you.

By all means seek out the blessed sanctuary of the Monastery down the road from Tolleshunt Knights, Essex, England. Or if you prefer the Holy Monastery of The Holy Archangels, by the village of Petru Voda, Poiana Teilui, Neamt, Romania, 5671; there:the blessed mothers will most certainly fulfil the words of the Holy Apostle Saint Paul, providing food, clothing, shelter, and if you should ask, doamne ajuta! they will find a blessed work to help the Prayer.

[Dusja]

Bless, Father! Do the nuns in Romania speak Russian (or English)?

[Fr Seraphim (Black)]

Bless, Father! Do the nuns in Romania speak Russian (or English)?

The nuns at the Monastery of St Panteleimon, Petru Voda, speak Romanian naturally which is also the liturgical language. But many speak English fluently, as well as French; the older ones will remember Russian from their school years when Romania was Communist. The Abbess, Maica Iustina speaks fluent English (if my memory serves me well) as do others, along with French, and perhaps German also. You can write Maica Iustina at the address I give above. It is a beautiful monastery set in the Carpathian Mountains. Doamne ajuta.