Question about evening prayers

[Alexis L. Williams]

Greetings in the Lord, everyone.

There is a certain part of St. Ephraim's Prayer to the Most Holy Spirit (included in the Evening Prayers) that I've been wondering about for some time now, and just never get around to asking anyone about. So, please forgive my ignorance, but here goes:

What exactly does it mean to "have seen the attraction of someone and been wounded by it in my heart?"

I love this prayer, but I'm not sure what is meant in this instance. A day doesn't go by that I don't find something (usually many somethings) in this list of sins that that I'm guilty of, and I'm probably guilty of this particular sin as well, but I'd just kind of like to know for sure.

I hope that all are having a spiritually profitable fast. My thanks for any help with my question.

With Love In Christ,
the sinful reader Alexis

[Henry Lee]

far as I understand and I've read this particular prayer mostly in old slavonic, this piece has to do with situations when you're grieved by someone else's success, when someone else is doing great and you're feeling down because of that, thinking to yourself thoughts like oh why is it that he/she always gets all the prizes in this life, and I always get made to sit at the back. It's sort of close to coveting what someone else has but deeper.

An illustration, some ten years ago me and a very handsome friend of mine were buying a bottle of carbonated water off a street stand, as my friend gave the money to the fem vendor she took a bottle out of a box, grabbed a rag, and wiped the dust off the bottle, all the time looking up at my friend with adoration, and I was hurt cause I thought she'd never look at me in the same way cause I'm not as attractive as my friend. So I saw my friend's attraction and I was wounded by it in my heart. This sin is a variation on selfishness, far as I can see.

[Denise Marie Johnson]

Greeting Alexis,
I have been reading the same prayer at night. I believe it means have you looked on someone of the opposite sex with lust. You should look at women as sisters.
denise

[Alexis L. Williams]

Dear Denise and Henry,

Thank you for your responses. And while you each gave different answers, it seems to me that probably they can both apply.

In any case, thats two more sins that will be brought to mind every night, and two more chances for me to repent.

With Love In Christ,
the sinful reader Alexis

[Fr Averky]

Dear in Christ
Alexis,

From what I understand, Denise's answer is the correct one, for that "wounding" is an aphorism for physical attraction.

Henry Lee's answer, while very good, would more likely come under the heading of "envy," because when he observed the girl being "wounded in her heart" when gazing at his friend, he felt badly that he was not as attractive, and that moment envied his friend's better looks. As we know, in the world good looks and physical beauty, are considered to be important yet they fade, but a person with a good heart and a loving disposition has so very much more to offer, for such gifts can last forever. If one wants to read a sobering example of what good looks can do, read Oscar Wilde's, "The Portrait of Dorian Grey," a thouroughly chilling book.

In the monastic life, especially when we are novices, and have occasion to go out of the monastery, we are urged to guard eyes, not letting our gaze settle on anyone for too long a time.

During Great Lent is a good time for us to practise guarding our bodies from all bad influences, whether by sight, sound, touch, or even by taste. It is a time to cleanse and refresh our souls.

May God give all of us the strength to persevere to the end!

Sincerely in Christ,

Father Averky

[Fr Averky]

Dear Friends.

Here is a wonderful monastic story told to us novices many years ago by our spiritual father.

One day, a monk was making a rare visit to a village to buy a few necessities. As he approached the the gates, he uttered a silent prayer: "O Lord, allow me to learn a lesson from the first person whom I shal encounter on this day." As he came to the very gates, a prostitute looked very boldly at him. The monk, attempting to chastize her said, "O fallen woman, why do you look at me so boldly?" The woman answered him and said, "O foolish monk, I am looking at that from which I came-flesh and bone, and if you were truly a good monk, you would not have even noticed me, for you would have been looking at that from which you came-the dust of the earth!" The monk lowered his head in shame, passed by her meekly, and went off praising God for the lesson he had received through His mercy that day. Amen."

Just a little good lesson for all of us.

Your
hieromonk Averky

[Effie Ganatsios]

Alexis, I read this prayer every night and, unfortunately, I usually have managed to commit many of the "sins" mentioned. I would not omit it from my evening prayers though because I find that it serves as a reminder during the day to try and be the person that I am meant to be.

I have always thought that " "have seen the attraction of someone and been wounded by it in my heart?" means that we have allowed ourselves to be attracted to the outward appearance of a certain individual.

When we first meet someone we react to their physical appearance and to other things like their voices and the look in their eyes. When we get to know these people a little better we sometimes find that their inner "appearance" is nothing at all like their outward one.

We are "wounded" in the sense that we have allowed something as fleeting as physical beauty to affect us. I think most of us judge a person, at least when we first meet them, on the way they look.

I find though that when I get to know someone their outward appearance has nothing to do with the way I feel. The people I love in my life are physically beautiful to me - both my family and my friends. The term "love is blind" is misleading I think. It's not that love is blind, in fact the exact opposite is true. When you love a person I think that you see what is in that person's heart and that is truly beautiful otherwise you would be incapable of loving them.

I think it's just a matter of reminding ourselves that a person is not always what his appearance would suggest him to be and it harms us to let ourselves be influenced by physical beauty alone.

Effie