View Full Version : Children's books for sex education?
I am searching for sex education books to use at home with my children, aged 6 and 10 yrs. I grew up with a set of "Life Cycle Encyclopedias" that explained the biological cycle of life and they were written/illustrated for young kids around 7-12 yrs. They were great - Unfortunately, I only have one of the collection now and can't locate new editions.
I'd like to find something appropriate written from an Orthodox author. So many of the books I'm finding today include topics on alternative lifestyles and such....
any suggestions?
Paul Cowan
24-02-2008, 11:39 PM
I am searching for sex education books to use at home with my children, aged 6 and 10 yrs. I grew up with a set of "Life Cycle Encyclopedias" that explained the biological cycle of life and they were written/illustrated for young kids around 7-12 yrs. They were great - Unfortunately, I only have one of the collection now and can't locate new editions.
I'd like to find something appropriate written from an Orthodox author. So many of the books I'm finding today include topics on alternative lifestyles and such....
any suggestions?
Hi Amy,
I can't answer your question on this book, but perhaps the Department of Marriage and Parish Family Ministries (http://antiochian.org/marriageandfamily)can offer this resource or equivelant? At least do a search on the website to see if you might find other resources.
Paul
Thanks so much for the link, Paul. I've been surprised to find such limited resources (Orthodox, RCC, OR Protestant) on this topic.
Amy, maybe you can read Fathers and what they advise about parenting and maybe there you will find some insights and can talk through their teachings to your children about the matters that are of concern at the moment.
Sorry, that you can not find what you are looking for. However pray to God; and He will enlighten your children by your prayers. I know that my parents blessed me and prayed for me (and my brother) and that is very helpful since a Father has said: "Talk more about your children to God than to your children about God." = Pray to God for your children.
Also during the years of adolescence examples helped me very much. Good examples always inspired me and kept me with the Grace of God away from harmful, or dangerous things, and kept me unaffected by peer pressure in many certain things. My favorites were the lives of the Saints especially young ones, since I could completely relate: such as St. Catherine, St. Demetrios the Myrrhbearer, St. Agnes (her name even means 'pure' which is equaled with 'virgin') and so on. The lives of saints are very important in my opinion. They are the living faith and normal people with feelings, temptations and lives just like ours who achieved deification. Maybe you can talk with your children, read together lives of these saints (try to find extended versions) make an analogy about martyrs who preserved their purity: martyr = adolescent, pagan persecutors = temptations, and at the end we receive a crown for our struggle, from Christ. For those who will marry the marriage crown symbolizes the crown of martyrdom (since the person struggled to preserve his/her purity) and in Greek it is called 'stephana' because of the first Martyr Stephan.
Your love is important too. I think Fr. Schmemann has said that a child that is loved is saved.
So even if there are no books we have the example of our parents, their love for us and each other, lives of extraordinary people like saints and what is more important the prayer and blessing of parents. And what is the most important the love of our God and His help when He sees a good intent and predisposition is our hearts. There is a thread 'Parenting' here on monachos and maybe you also dear Amy can share here and there blessed advise.
P.S How could I forget the lives of Christ and Panagia? They of course are the epitome of purity in the midst of the world. And Bible also has great examples in general.
and in Greek it is called 'stephana' because of the first Martyr Stephan.
Actually, Nina, the word stephanon (crown or wreath) is a very ancient word, and it is from this word that the name Stephen/Stephanos is derived. Many names (such as the above-mentioned Agnes) are derived from virtues or other characteristics. Andrew (manly, brave), Nicholas (victory of the people) and Basil(regal) are but a few similar examples.
Actually, Nina, the word stephanon (crown or wreath) is a very ancient word, and it is from this word that the name Stephen/Stephanos is derived.
Actually, Olga, I was speaking within an Orthodox context/framework. My spiritual mother, who is a nun, has taught me that the meaning to the 'stefana' comes from Protomartyr Stefan. The newlywed are receiving the crown of martyrdom. They won the war of the flesh and they are being rewarded. But you would have known that since in the times of pagans they did not believe in martyrdom.
Nina
You are, of course, correct in saying that the crowns or wreaths worn by the couple during the wedding ceremony are symbolic of the martyrdom, the "giving of self" of each spouse to the other during their future life together. Yet, like so much in Orthodoxy, there is more than one meaning.
"O Lord, crown them with glory and honour" are the words the priest chants to them after placing the wreaths or crowns on their heads. They are honoured as martyrs, but also as heads of their new household, as king and queen. There are also other shades of meaning in the act of crowning, which can be found throughout the truly rich and beautiful text of the marriage ceremony. Interestingly, at the dismissal "May Christ our true God ...", the saints who are mentioned specifically are Greatmartyr Procopius (the first Christian martyr of Caesarea), and Sts Constantine and Helen.
Yes Olga, but this thread is not about the explanation of the symbolism behind the stefana and the Orthodox wedding ceremony. By keeping it short and to the point (tying the stefana with Protomartyr Stephan), I was trying to help Amy a bit with some ideas since she is looking about books for children for educating them with Christian values about sexuality. But of course the information you give is good and profitable.
Thank you for the replies. Yes, you are right, Nina, there is no better action I can take for my children than prayer. And I do pray for them, always. We have several books on various saints that we read and discuss. Their favorite at the moment is The Blackbird's Nest: The Story of St. Kevin. We love our books! My motto is that you cannot have enough books or candles.
Our son is 10 and, a few years back when my sister was pregnant, he was very curious to know how that works. I did my best to explain the life cycle in a way that I thought he would understand. He's a very logical, systematic thinker, always wanting to know 'how things work' from drain pipes to human babies. Well, my explanation was too vague for him. He came home and, without my knowing, pulled my medical encyclopedia off the shelf so he could read up on his own. Books can be such a great help, especially when broaching a subject that many parents find difficult.
It would be nice to find a book suitable for kids aged 6-12 years that talk about the body, growth/puberty and the biology of life and sexuality that ALSO incorporates the understanding of sacredness of the body being the temple of God and sex within marriage as God intended as an act of love and union.
I know that's a LOT of territory to cover for young minds, but as parents, I think we have to set the groundwork for understanding how God has designed us in order that we might have healthy views of our bodies and our relationships with others.
Ah...just rambling really =-) thanks for listening... maybe I should write a book myself.
Thank you for the replies. Yes, you are right, Nina, there is no better action I can take for my children than prayer. And I do pray for them, always. We have several books on various saints that we read and discuss. Their favorite at the moment is The Blackbird's Nest: The Story of St. Kevin. We love our books! My motto is that you cannot have enough books or candles.
Our son is 10 and, a few years back when my sister was pregnant, he was very curious to know how that works. I did my best to explain the life cycle in a way that I thought he would understand. He's a very logical, systematic thinker, always wanting to know 'how things work' from drain pipes to human babies. Well, my explanation was too vague for him. He came home and, without my knowing, pulled my medical encyclopedia off the shelf so he could read up on his own. Books can be such a great help, especially when broaching a subject that many parents find difficult.
It would be nice to find a book suitable for kids aged 6-12 years that talk about the body, growth/puberty and the biology of life and sexuality that ALSO incorporates the understanding of sacredness of the body being the temple of God and sex within marriage as God intended as an act of love and union.
I know that's a LOT of territory to cover for young minds, but as parents, I think we have to set the groundwork for understanding how God has designed us in order that we might have healthy views of our bodies and our relationships with others.
Ah...just rambling really =-) thanks for listening... maybe I should write a book myself.
You should write a book! :D Many actually!
Love your motto about books and candles, dear Amy! I also tend to collect incense (of course form Orthodox places all over the world). A little box of incense my mom gave me last, before departing, and she placed a pink ladybug sticker on it, I have not burned it yet, but I keep it by my bedside and I smell its aroma when I miss my mother. It is a source of peace and comfort because it is something we have in our faith and because when I used to get flu, or ill as a child my grandmother and mother always were burning incense. See, I am guilty of soliloquy as well. ;)
Of course children are curious and will come into contact with various things, especially in this age. Important is that we instill in them love for purity, and what is godly.
Sieglinde McGinnis
29-02-2008, 01:34 AM
I am searching for sex education books to use at home with my children, aged 6 and 10 yrs. I grew up with a set of "Life Cycle Encyclopedias" that explained the biological cycle of life and they were written/illustrated for young kids around 7-12 yrs. They were great - Unfortunately, I only have one of the collection now and can't locate new editions.
I'd like to find something appropriate written from an Orthodox author. So many of the books I'm finding today include topics on alternative lifestyles and such....
any suggestions?
Amy,
I recently purchased the "Mother's Little Helper" and "Listen, Son" as a set from Angelus Press. They are, I think, close to what you might be looking for. Here is the link:
http://www.angeluspress.org/oscatalog/item/8254/set-listen,-son-or-mothers-little-helper
Nothing about alternative lifestyles in them at all. I am pleased with them.
Sieglinde
It would be nice to find a book suitable for kids aged 6-12 years that talk about the body, growth/puberty and the biology of life and sexuality that ALSO incorporates the understanding of sacredness of the body being the temple of God and sex within marriage as God intended as an act of love and union.
Yes, it would be nice to have a book, but I think we know our kids best and know how to talk with them. I have found the life of the Church to be an excellent visual for my children, especially to teach such abstract concepts as 'holiness'.
I make it a point to tell them why we do the things we do and why we don't do certain other things. I don't always connect it with their bodies, I connect it with holiness. And then, whenever the topic of bodies comes up, they've already got a general idea of what it means to treat something in a holy way.
The few things we've talked about - the Altar - not everyone is allowed to go in there, you go in only if you have a blessing, and even the priest only goes in there when he has to, and not just because he feels like it. Why? (a right time, place, thing, person for everything you do...- everything we do, and say and think is either meaningful or idle. It's the idle stuff that leads us into sin, really fast.)
The Gifts - they are kept covered and great care taken to keep them from spilling, etc. Why?
Icons - we venerate them, keep them clean, don't draw on them, don't toss them on the floor, etc.... why?
We kiss the priest's hand, the cross, etc - why?
All of these things that we do, are practical ways of treating holy things in a holy way. We are living icons of Christ, since we're all created in God's image. Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit. So we keep our own bodies holy, and also the bodies of others. So we keep them covered properly, not everyone is allowed to see or touch... etc. It's also not ok to participate, even just by watching, when others are desecrating their own temples. (porn).
Practical things from real life:
If you have something of great value - say a lot of treasures - with pirates being a favorite race nowadays, treasures are easy to talk about. Treasures are usually kept hidden. Unless you're an idiot. You hang wind chimes on the porch, not your gold and silver and diamonds. The more you value a thing, the more safe you keep it. You find a strong box for it. You keep it locked. You don't let anyone else see it or even know where it is, unless it's your most trusted friend. Even you, do not take your treasures out everyday to play with them, just knowing they are safe and that they are yours, brings joy.
Our bodies are gifts from God, we need to learn to treasure them, in the right way. Besides proper physical relationships, this will include eating right, exercise, cleanliness, etc.
Our relationships are also gifts from God, to be treasured and nurtured and not taken lightly, etc.
Same with money, toys, or anything else that they value... They have a natural sense of wanting to protect the things they value. Just build it up.
Hope this helps.
In Christ,
Mary.
PS - my kids are just 9 and 6, so I can't tell you how they turn out. At least, I have benefitted from my own instructions, and I am left without a shred of excuse for my slothfulness.
Sieglinde, thank you for posting the link to the books. I had not run across them and appreciate you pointing me in that direction.
Also, Mary, such beautiful thoughts! lots of wisdom there...thank you for sharing. Of course you are right - it isn't just having "the talk" with our kids, it's an open dialogue that is built upon over their developing years. I am glad to be reminded of that.
Maybe it's just that I learn best by reading, but even as I was reviewing your post, I kept thinking, "yes! this would be good material for a book!" There is a book titled, Making God Real in the Orthodox Christian Home by Anthony M. Coniaris that I use frequently. It's full of small devotionals and practical things we, as parents, can do to nurture and train our children in the faith. Your thoughts above would fit right into it =-)
Blessings to you all-
Nina said:
"Of course children are curious and will come into contact with various things, especially in this age. Important is that we instill in them love for purity, and what is godly."
Amen!
I am curious to know what type/fragrance of incense did your mother gift you with?
I am curious to know what type/fragrance of incense did your mother gift you with?
Dear Amy,
It is Acacia incense from the monastery of St. John the Baptist in Karea (Athens' suburb).
Mary, I like very much what you posted about life in the church being also one of the best methods for training children in a life in Christ. I appreciated everything and this:
I make it a point to tell them why we do the things we do and why we don't do certain other things. I don't always connect it with their bodies, I connect it with holiness.
Because it reminded me something from St. Kosmas Aetolos:
St. Paraskeve
LET US SAY something about the good earth. St. Paraskeve was a twelve-year-old maiden from a noble house. Left an orphan, she divided up all her possessions among the poor, and with these she purchased paradise. In place of cosmetics, she wore tears, remembering tier sins. In place of earrings, she kept her ears open to hear the sacred Scriptures. In place of a necklace, she fasted often, which made her neck shine like the sun. In place of rings, she acquired calluses on her fingers from the many prostrations she made. In place of a golden belt, she had her virginity which she guarded all her life. In place of a dress, she was covered by modesty and fear of God. This is how the saint decked herself. Link (http://www.stmaryofegypt.org/kosmas/second.html).
I feel like a total zero when I read these words about this child-saint.
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